An Open Letter to the Man I Pushed Away

First off, I just wanted to say that I am sorry. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I want to scream it from a mountain top. I want to curl up at your feet and beg you to forgive me! I want to tell you a million times until you realize that I am sincere, but I cannot say it enough. I can’t find the words to tell you how much I wish I could go back and do everything all over again. Even then, would you believe me? I messed up and I know that. In trying to keep from hurting myself, I hurt you and that was wrong. I’ve spent every day of the last few months regretting what I did. I thought that time would take away the guilt and regret, but at the end of the day, I still hate myself for losing you.

You were something different. You came into my world unannounced. It all started with an innocent conversation and the next thing I knew I was spending most of my precious spare moments of free time with you. And the crazy thing is, I liked it. I liked that you were easy to talk to. I liked that you were comforting and understanding when I was stressed or busy. Most of all, I liked that you wanted to have a presence in my life. But soon, all the things I liked began to hoover over me like dark clouds.

In all honesty, I was afraid. I was afraid that you might make me happy, and then change your mind and leave me broken and hurt. I started trying to think of ways to slow down the pace; ways to keep my feelings at bay. I rationalized that I didn’t want a relationship because I was moving, because I was focused on my career, because I didn’t want anyone to hold me back or because I didn’t have the time to fully commit to someone and that wouldn’t be fair.

You were so good to me. Nicer than anyone has ever been. I was so afraid that it was all an act. I thought it was a show to gain my affections. I was afraid of being a rebound. I didn’t want to be a stepping stone that you would leave once you had your balance back.

Losing you was hard. At first, I didn’t even realize what I had done. How do you lose someone you never had? I pushed so hard, but I never realized how much it would hurt when you walked away. I hurt you in the process of trying to save myself.

Although you still care, I know that I broke your trust. You won’t be letting your guard down anytime soon. I take full responsibility and I know that it is all my fault. I wish that I could confess everything and tell you how I feel, but the truth is that I don’t know how. I’m still afraid, but this time it’s because I don’t know what I would do if I told you everything and you didn’t say a word. I’m stuck with the haunted memories of a stranger who I should have loved when I had the chance. 

Let's Talk Politics

Welcome back!

I'm so glad you've decided to join in on yet another adventure with Dallas's Dabbles. Today I'm going to step a little outside of my comfort zone and talk politics. But wait! Before you throw your hands up in exasperation and exit my blog, let me first share the understanding I have of the importance of having a political voice. Currently in our congress are several persons who have never set foot on a farm or ranch. They may not always understand why we agriculturalist have concerns surrounding seemingly simple concepts such as water rights, right to farm policies, the selling dollar for cash crops/trade commodities and free trade agreements with international companies. Yet they are the ones who make laws that could drastically change our livelihood.You can bet your britches we are going to want someone in office who makes being an agriculturalist less stressful. The only question is, how do we make our voice heard?

Political Discussions

Political discussions can be both a blessing and a curse. Either way, they are a vital function that allow nth generation farms or even brand new ones to have a voice in government policies that effect their way of life. There are both good things and not-so-good things about each bill or legislative piece that passes through the Capital Hill in your state. Today I want to take a look at some of the more recent agricultural activity in our government and discuss some pits and peaks of pollinator bills. 

Pollinators

What is a pollinator? This is one of the first things we need to define before we begin delving into legislation involving pollinators. According the U.S. National Park Service, "A pollinator is anything that helps carry pollen from the male part of the flower (stamen) to the female part of the same or another flower (stigma)". Included, but not limited to are: butterflies, lizards, birds, bees and insects. In order to maintain a steady crop and food source, we MUST have pollinators.Our current pollinator population is suffering; down to 2.5 million colonies from 6 million in 1947. Though we cannot pinpoint and blame one specific crisis for the massive wipe-outs, we can begin to take cautious and preventative methods within our government that at least 9 other states are participating in. 

Some Issues at Hand

Pesticides are a hot speaking point it seems like no matter where I go. They are also publicly believed to be a major contributor to pollinator decline. Though we do not currently have sufficient evidence to support that the pesticides used are what's actually causing the decline, we are taking preventative measures in our agricultural policies. Som
e states like Washington and California have adopted a policy that mandates farmers use pollen rich plants in place of weedy cover crops to support pollinator habitats in the off-season. Other measures, such as total habitat restoration, are also underway. 

So if I'm Not a Farmer, How are Pollinator Bills Going to Effect Me? 

You don't have to be a farmer to see the effects of pollinator bills. Many of the traditional methods that farmers use are to keep cost inputs down so that consumers can benefit from cheap groceries. If agriculturalists must find new, more costly ways to produce the same food, you can bet (but not too much) on seeing a significant rise in food prices. Despite that is kinda sucks we might have to pay more for food, regulating pesticide use that may harm pollinators is a great sustainability method. I would rather pay more for food than not have any available to me at all. Once our pollinators are gone, we will not be able to sustain life for very long on our own. 

Clowns Are Scary; Pig Farmers Aren't

Halloween is approaching fast and with it murderous clowns, superstitions and the tale of La Llorona scaring children off the streets and into their homes before the sun sets. Hocus Pocus, The Hills Have Eyes, The Evil Dead and more will be playing on TV screens across America. Lucky for us, we know that the events in these movies are not real. We may cuddle up close to our crush or sleep with a baseball bat next to the bed for a few days, but for the most part, the terror is over when the credits roll. Not all scary things have to do with Halloween though. In the agricultural industry, people just like you and I are scared about the safety and quality of their food. Hot topics such as GMO's, hormones, anti-biotics and more can cause quite a scare in the consumer sector. But just as the scary ends when the credits roll for a movie, we can take the terror out of agriculture by thinking with our heads and not our imagination. There are many scary rumors going around about pig farming. These rumors include that there is antibiotic residue in the meat we buy in the stores, that pig farmers do not care about their animals, sows are kept pregnant and in farrowing crates their entire life and that we would all be better off if nobody raised pigs. Take a look at this infographic that I put together and decide for yourself!

Still think pig farmers are scary? Check out this link to put a personable face to the job!

I am a Voice for Agriculture, and I am Learning to Speak Up

"Be fearless in the pursuit of what sets your soul on fire".  I have never been one to stand around and watch idly as my dreams surpass me, so naturally it made sense for me to seize this amazing opportunity to spread truth about the industry that I love. You may have seen me posting more than usual on social media. I have started using hashtags, cool graphics and facts about livestock. But what is this #CAO16, and why do I use it so much?

What does C.A.O stand for?

First off, C.A.O is short for College Aggies Online. We are a bunch of passion ridden agriculture students and groups from across the U.S. Though we may not always be on the same side of the stadium come Saturday, we stand hand in hand when it comes to loving agriculture. If you feel the same, there is still time to sign up your group or club and compete for cash prizes by following this link: http://animalagalliance.org/connect/#collegeaggies . 

What is my role in #CAO16? 

As a 2016 competitor, my role in College Aggies Online is to create social media posts that reflect common misconceptions in the agricultural industries. Some of these hot topics include hormones, anti-biotic use and animal welfare. Each week for 9 weeks, there is a different animal theme. Via Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and my blog, I tell Ag's story one post at a time. 

Who am I?

Who am I? Who am I? *begin terrible Eddy Murphy impression of Mushu from Mulan* I am the generous, the gregarious, the indispensable Dallas Dooley. I grew up on a small family farm where we raised everything but wages. After I left for college at New Mexico State University, my mom started a horse rescue called Phoenix Equine. She is a firm believer that bad things happen to good people, and she gives all horses a second chance at life and service. If you ask me, her compassion extends to more than just horses which is why our farm looks more like a petting zoo than a business. However, my mother's compassion is the trait I am most proud to have inherited. It allows me to step back and gives me time to try and understand when someone shares an opinion different than my own. Growing up on a farm taught me how to love and care for animals, though I was not always so good with the ones that could talk back (aka humans). After leaving the farm and going to a university that was several hours removed from my friends, family and animals, I started to get really involved to fill the void of farm chores. As a result, my social skills began to blossom. Years later, I am able to carry on a conversation with a brick wall if necessary, but I can still sympathize with agriculturalist who struggle with talking to people not directly related to the farm. I am a voice for agricultureand through College Aggies Online, I am learning to speak up. 

Time flies when you are having fun. Being a competitor in #CAO16 is no different. We are already at the end of week 3! If you are having a great time keeping up with all of our posts, don't fret because we still have 6 weeks to go. Don't forget to check back in with me for next week's theme: Crops. 

National Pork Month is Finally Here!

The nights are getting colder, pumpkin spice is overwhelming the market and the smell of bacon is in the air. Wait, what? Yes folks, that's right; bacon. Amongst the many things that the month of October brings us; pumpkin spice, jack-o-lanterns, s'mores by the fire, hay rides, Halloween, etc, pork products are more than worthy of being added to the list because October is National Pork Month! While this gives me an excuse to eat bacon 31 days in a row, it also gives me a chance to tell the #realpigfarming stories of my friends, families and mentors whose way of life centers around raising happy, healthy pigs. Although we now have access to delicious pork products such as bacon, pork chops, sausage and ribs year round, we were not always so blessed. October is the official month of pork because this is the time of year that pigs were traditionally taken to market. Even though we no longer have a season specific market, our farmers are still committed to producing a quality product every single day. Here are some creative ways to celebrate National Pork Month, and don't forget to thank a farmer for all that they and their families do to keep food in front of mine and yours.
1. Take a Virtual Farm Tour
Pig farmers cannot let you into their barns because it would increase the risk of disease and harm to their pigs. There is also the chance for undercover videos that have been twisted to put farmers in a bad light to be filmed. Virtual tours are a great way see what goes on while still keeping the pigs safe and healthy. Check out this link to get you started.

2. Eat Bacon Pumpkin Quinoa
Combine the best of both worlds with this yummy treat! It's healthy, easy to make, and best of all it has bacon! Not quite your speed? Try these other 27 unique ways to eat bacon.

3. Write a Thank You Letter to a Farmer
National Pork Month is really a celebration of the pig farmers who continue to grow a quality product for us to enjoy. Real pig farmers do not expect a reward for their hard work; healthy pigs is reward enough. However, a good old fashioned thank you letter never hurt a soul. Let them know how much we appreciate them! Get started on your own thank you letter with one of these templates.

4. Change Your Social Media Profile Picture
Let your friends and family know that you are celebrating National Pork Month by adding #RealPigFarming to your social media profile pictures. You can find the link here.
But do not stop at your own picture! Feel free to share this link and encourage others to show their support of our nation's bacon growers.

5. Ask Questions
Not familiar with pig farming? Let us answer your questions by using the #realpigfarming link. Simply ask your questions, add the hashtag and wait for one of our pig farming experts or communication specialists to answer your questions. Can't figure out myth from fact for anti-biotics, feed additives, growth hormones or animal welfare practices? No problem! We are always more than happy to help. Here is a quick link to get you started.

You can find more creative ways to celebrate National Pork Month by following this link.

Essential Tools for the Livestock Showman

When you show livestock, you need to be equipped with many tools. As an exhibitor, you an arsenal of feed buckets, brushes, show sticks, show sheen, halters, gate chains, extension cords, fans, blowers, and much, much more. As a parent, you should always have the right equipment to save the day. Snacks, blankets, tissues, drinks, entry fees, shot records, feeding records, chairs and a fresh change of clothes are a pretty good start (notice how sanity is not listed). This week I had my first experience at New Mexico State Fair. I came to support my students and run errands, though I mostly seemed to get in the way.

My week began early Friday morning as I watched my cooperating teacher (who was all business) load the trailer we would be taking to the fair. I should have known by looking at the tremendous amount of equipment packed into the trailer that I was going to be in for one wild ride. Yet, come Monday, I was still trying to understand why my 21-year-old body was begging me for a break. In four short days, I have learned more about pigs, cattle and students than I ever thought there was to learn. I have shared the “joys and discomforts¹” of this agricultural life with both students and parents. Like the Grinch looking down at Whoville on Christmas morning, my heart has expanded as I’ve watch these youth pour everything they have into one person’s opinion. I’ve witnessed the triumphs as one of my sophomore students accomplished her career long dream of winning Grand Champion Goat. In the same breath, I’ve watched grown men cry as the hog that father and son had

diligently groomed and prepped since the day he came home from the breeder crossed scales and was over his weight limit to show. I supplied the tender, loving embrace of a mother to her child to the young man who was to exhibit that hog and tried desperately to not share in the tears he shed. Countless youth have told me that the number one reasons they show is to miss school and hang out with friends, but in moments like this I know that what drives them to be livestock exhibitors is far more than that.

If you were able to share in the experiences that I have lived in this short amount of time, you would be overcome with emotions as you recall the highs, lows and good times that have nothing to do with winning or losing. In fact, as we recall our essential tools, I believe you will agree with me that a pen, paper and camera are among the MOST essential items you could have in your show box. These items are simple and no you will not need them to groom your animal, but believe me when I say you will need them. You will need the pen to remind you that the choices you make have a lasting effect. Once you make them, you cannot erase or wipe clean what has been done. The paper is to remind you that though the pen may be permanent, you can always turn the page. It is important to not stay stuck on a page that is already full, or to dwell on mistakes that have been made. A clean sheet may seem hard to fill at first, but it has endless opportunity for creativity and growth. All you need to do is have the courage to write, be it wrong or right, the first sentence. Lastly we come to the camera to remind you to capture the memories. One year from now you will look back and marvel at how much has changed and how far you have come.

Though I am hardly an expert on livestock showing, the lessons I have learned thus far have been an invaluable part of my experience. Sharing these experiences with my students has made me feel more a vital part of their lives than any lectures I’ve ever given them in class. I hope that they continue to flourish into productive young adults and that they always remember to carry the proper equipment.

Enjoying downtime between shows with friends

Staring competition between a steer and myself during the show 

Sisters and friends prep for showtime

My students rocking it during the senior showmanship 

1 excerpt from E.M. Tiffany's FFA Creed

Quick UPDATE - Jr Market Lambs

This first class of market lambs are light weight fine wools. This means that they areb117 pounds or less. Though these lambs are sheared for the judge to more easily determine muscling and fat throughout the body, "fine wool" means that their hair is usually thin and silky. Fine wools hair is not generally very long. We call the length of a lock of wool its "staple". Right now the judge is determining which lamb is the most structurally correct, exhibits the most breed characteristics and is the most market ready.